When God seems deaf: handling the 'dark times' as a Christian

Pastor Hans Voortman

One of the hardest things to handle as a Christian are those times when the wheels seem to fall off our experience with God. When suddenly everything is out of sync. and the intimacy and oneness you had with the Lord is lost. Often, for no apparent reason, you're suddenly on a different wavelength. Try as you might, God seems a million miles away and you find yourself even wondering whether He's there at all!

Perhaps you think all you had before was an illusion. Was it but a cruel hoax or even worse, self-delusion? Perhaps all those sceptics were right! Maybe there really is no God and your 'religious' experiences before were simply a product of some induced psychosomatic state. Your recent unanswered prayers; the mechanical ways of your present experience with God; the absolute silence with which God now greets you; these have contributed to this rapid downward spiral in your Christian faith. You're going through the motions. You're sitting in church feeling cynical, even hypocritical, and all the while your friends keep talking about what God's been doing! Their 'happy-clappy' faith nauseates you, and you feel like running out screaming and raising your fist to the heavens. You want to yell at your friends and especially at what you perceive to be their spiritual hype and sanctimonious platitudes!

THE LOSS OF GOD'S PRESENCE.

I've painted a pretty bleak scenario! Perhaps you can identify with some levels of this downward spiral, for it seems to be a dilemma most Christians grapple with in their journey toward Christian maturity. It seems to be par for the course, yet it's rarely understood or talked about. Contemporary charismatic experience is built so much on the 'up' sense of God's presence in our lives, that we often don't even admit, let alone understand, that sometimes Christian life can be 'down', even flat! For most of us, the testing of our faith is conveniently ignored in our quest for the blessing, prosperity and power our charismatic expectations have led us to expect.

Some years ago, I wrote on some of these issues in the "What's Your Question?" column of New Day . However, I've felt the necessity of revisiting these issues more extensively by way of this article, because I meet so many people who seem to be grappling with the "heavens feeling like brass" (Deut 28:23). This state of spiritual 'suspended animation' can go on for weeks, months and even years, to the point where the individual reaches screaming point in their soul! Unfortunately, some give up and wander away from their faith completely.

So what's it all about? Why is God being so torturous? What's His purpose in it all? Is God allowing it, or is the devil causing it? Does it relate to something more subtle in the human psyche?

THE DARK NIGHT OF THE SOUL

In talking to many Christians, particularly those that are eager to go on with God, the 'darkness' of God has inexplicably enveloped them, usually at times when they've least expected it. St John of the Cross called it "the dark night of the soul". Tozer called it "the ministry of the night" and Spurgeon preached about the "child of light walking in darkness". Winkie Pratney in his excellent book, The Thomas Factor talks of a "cloud of unknowing". He states, "It is not the darkness of wrong or guilt or demonic oppression. It is not sin; instead, an inexplicable sense of loss, uncertainty, perplexity. It is above all a withdrawn sense of the presence of God."

If you've felt this alarming state, perhaps it's some assurance to know you're not alone! Abraham went through it when he stood waiting for God to accept his sacrifice (Genesis 15:12). It came to Job when he looked for good and evil came (Job 30:26). David knew the feeling of deep calling to deep and cried out, "Why have you forgotten me?" (Psalm 42:7,9). It came to prophets and they wept; it came to godly kings and they cried out in desperation. One dark day it even came to Jesus himself: "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" (Mark 15:34) So, you're in good company! But that still does not answer the question, "Why?"

GOD AT WORK

From my pastoral experience, I've come to see that these dark nights of the soul are mostly a product of God at work. People may at times go through stressful experiences in life that cause spin-offs in their spiritual walk. However, usually when this is the case, the signs are obvious and don't last too long. In the arena of spiritual warfare, there may, at times, be a sense of demonic oppression and opposition. With the tools of prayer - the believer's authority and continued faith - continued resistance will cause Satan to flee. In fact, fighting demons without is somehow easier to deal with than struggling with God within !

SEEKING AFTER GOD

This sense of God being 'tone deaf' to our cries is a normal part of His dealing with us. In a sense, He sets us up to go on a love-hunt for Him. As a winsome lover might play 'hard to get', so God doesn't want us to take His presence for granted. There's something critical to our Christian development when we learn to "hunger and thirst after righteousness" (Matt. 5:6); when we seek in order to find (Matt. 7:7). As with the woman with the lost coin (Luke 15:8-9), God loves it when we leave no stone unturned in our quest to find Him. The prodigal's father exclaimed, "That which is lost has been found!" (Luke 15:24) Similarly, our relationship with God seems to reach a new level of intimacy as we rediscover Him afresh: "Absence," in that sense, "makes the heart grow fonder." When God seems deaf to your cries, learn to identify it as God wanting you to seek after Him all the more! With Shadrach, Meshach and Abnednego say, ". the God we serve is able to save us . But even if he does not, . we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold" (Dan 3:17-18). That's the true tenor of faith. That's the heart God longs for in all of us.

THE RESPONSE OF FAITH

Learning to live by faith is one of the most fundamental lessons in Christianity - to walk not by sight, but by faith (2 Cor. 5:7) I once preached a sermon entitled, "Living in Ultimate Security", during which, I asked: "What would be the ultimate test for a Christian?" My answer was, "To keep on loving God, even if you never again sensed His presence."

So many of us serve God, and react to God through our feelings and needs. We take for granted that "in the presence of God is joy and at his right hand are pleasures for ever more" (Psalm 16:11). It's natural to live in sunshine, yet a lot of heaven's journey must be made at night, when we can't sense or feel as we would in the day. Faced by this challenge, many Christians throw in the towel, because they don't feel God any more.

I always remember something one of the real pioneers of contemporary Christian music, Barry McGuire, said in a concert: "I don't serve God so I'll go to heaven, or so I won't go to hell. I serve God because He is right !" Now rightness has little to do with feelings. It's rather to do with the fact that God is ! Period! There is a bumper sticker which declares a profound truth: "If God seems far away, guess who's moved?!" When we don't feel God, or sense Him blessing us, many of us are inclined to think that God has left us. Yet, He is omnipresent. "I will never leave you, nor forsake you" (Heb. 13:5) is His promise. Our feelings may be telling us one thing - the "Heaven's may be as brass". There may be no answers coming through, yet the reality is, God is not dead!

I'm sure what we are often facing is the 'testing of our faith' to mature us (James 1:3). If you were God, interested in seeing a person's commitment to Yourself and for Yourself, what would you do? How would you wean a generation away from its love of pleasure and sensual experience and introduce it to the realm of faith? How would you change a people from walking by feelings, to living in trust? How would you teach them to develop spiritual metal; that capacity to endure hardship, practise patience, get rid of the dross in their lives and to live victoriously? Not to live in our own strength but in the victory of Jesus Christ? (Galatians 2:20). As Christians, we so easily mouth this, yet often buckle under the challenge of "living by faith". For some the challenge manifests itself through a testing of their health, for others it's perhaps a financial crisis. For many of us though, it's more commonly through experiencing the 'darkness' of God. Whatever the crisis, the purpose is still the same: that we might be a people who live by the promises of God, in spite of what we might feel!

GOD'S PATHWAY TO SPIRITUAL GROWTH

Sometimes I'm convinced my experience of the 'darkness' of God is what the Lord has used to prise me out of my comfort zone. It's so easy to plateau off in our Christian walk. Yet God is interested in transforming us "from glory to glory" (2 Cor. 3:18). I remember God speaking to me of this through my three sons. Winter had come again and it was time to dig out last year's "woollies". But of course the inevitable occurred - everything was too small! They had outgrown their clothes! And God spoke to me saying, "Son - you hanker for the experience of me, wanting to feel me and sense me like you did before. Well, you haven't lost it, you've simply outgrown it!"

The 'darkness' of God is often simply this experience of shedding "former things" and "putting on the new". God doesn't allow us to put on our old, well loved and familiar spiritual 'jumper'. Instead He challenges us to let go of the old and put on the new (Col. 3:10). And the speed at which we're prepared to take up the new, usually determines the length the 'darkness' of God stays with us. The challenge again is one of faith, to trust the new thing God is leading us into, when in our flesh we would rather run back to the secure and familiar.

HITTING THE TARGET

Perhaps two final illustrations might shed further understanding. They've certainly helped me! The first is of a bow being pulled back to project an arrow. As the tension in the bow grows, so the effectiveness of flight and hitting the target are maximised. Yet, at the point of discharge, the arrow is furthest from the very target it's trying to hit! The 'darkness' of God is often filled with that same sense of tension. You want to hit the target, but God seems to be pulling you the other way! Relax! Once more the challenge is to trust. Stop struggling and let God's process of preparation continue. - He's aiming you toward the target. Invariably, the greater the tension, the further you'll go!! "Have Faith in God" (Mark 11:22),

The second relates to the gears of a car. When changing gears, there's that moment of disengagement whilst a new gear is selected. Similarly, I've found 'spiritual disengagement' occurs when God changes the spiritual 'gears' of my life. This is either to prepare me for a new spiritual incline requiring greater effort, or to coast for a while in overdrive as I enjoy the good things of God. Remember again, God is in control. Times of 'darkness' represent disengagement essential for the new challenge ahead. Far from feeling disorientated, I'm learning to respond with a sense of excitement at what new levels of spiritual opportunity God has in store for me! I guess that's what "all things working together for good" really means (Romans 8:28).

CONCLUSION

Let me finish with some enlightening words from C.H. Spurgeon, the great preacher at the turn of the century. "Be not dismayed at Soul Trouble! Serve God with all you might while the candle is burning, and then when it goes out for a season, you will have the less to regret. Any simpleton can follow the narrow path in Light: faith's rare wisdom enables us to march on in the dark with infallible accuracy, since she places her hand in that of her Guide." Between here and heaven there may be rougher weather to come. But, come fair or come foul, when we cannot see the face of our God, be it ours to trust under the shadow of His wings (Psalm 36:7).

 

References:

• Winkie Pratney, The Thomas Factor , 1989, Chosen Books, New Jersey